CCSS PAIP

Parenting is tough; co-parenting is tougher.  Mix in an order of protection and co-parenting develops an even deeper level of challenge.  All 50 states and the District of Columbia have some form of protection order statutes. In Illinois, they are called Orders of Protection.  An Order of Protection may include many different provisions, such as: No Contact: This provision prohibits calling, texting, emailing, stalking, attacking, hitting, or disturbing.  “No Contact” orders may also prohibit communication through a third party. No Unlawful Contact : Such a requirement permits partners to peacefully communicate for limited reasons, including arranging care or visitation for their child.  Stay Away: This type of order requires one party to stay at least a certain number of yards or feet away from the other person, as well as the other person’s home, job, school, and car. The stay-away distance can vary ...

For some, defining domestic violence can be confusing. Some people unknowingly place themselves at risk because they dismiss red-flag behaviors. As we dig into the foundations of emotional intelligence, we discover tools that can help us prevent violence from occurring.  One such tool is the BELIEVE model.   We can use the  BELIEVE  model to help us pinpoint r thinking and behaviors that are unhealthy, risky, or downright dangerous. BELIEVE stands for Boundaries, Entitlement, Lies and Manipulation, Isolation and Intimidation, Expectations, Victim Stance and Eggshells. In every unhealthy relationship there is a lack of boundaries .  Boundaries  are necessary  to outline areas of individual accountability and to provide very clear markers so that partners do not overwhelm one another. Boundaries also help prevent one partner from  smothering the other and inhibiting independence. Entitlement occurs when one partner assumes...

The term abuse can be insidious because it can encompass so many things and occurs differently in so many contexts, so defining abuse can be difficult and confusing for all parties involved. Domestic abuse is defined by the National Network to End Domestic Violence as "any act in which one individual repeatedly uses means to humiliate, depersonalize or control his or her intimate partner with the sole purpose of intimidating, coercing  and controlling that other person. This can include physical, sexual or verbal assaults, embarrassment, insults, manipulation of children; verbal threats, or simply overpowering body language." When processing the subject of domestic violence, the best place to start is by identifying it. There are 5 broad categories of abuse. In most abusive relationships, multiple forms are present. The most significant aspect of each type of abuse is fear. In previous weeks we have discussed empathy and noted that empathy occurs when we c...

“As soon as we wish to be happier, we are no longer happy.” -Walter Landor Contentment: what does that word mean? Well, according to the dictionary contentment is defined as a state of happiness and satisfaction. But how many of us can actually say we are happy? In our modern and fast-paced world, it seems we aren’t so much enjoying happiness as seeking the next thing that will make us happy, or happier. According to Walter Landor, an English writer and poet, the minute we start seeking the next happiness, we stop being happy and start striving for something else. It is that desire for more happiness that robs us of the enjoyment of happiness in the moment. Two of the changes we can make to help ourselves pause and actually experience happiness are identifying what really makes us happy and concentrate on that happiness, not chasing it, not increasing it, just concentrating on it and enjoying it. Please complete the following assignment and allow your mind to m...

No matter how confined we might feel, sheltering in place in our homes, there is no denying that spring is in the air. Flowers bloom; squirrels scamper; trees bud; and birds sing. Colors are right outside our windows. We can embody some of that color and sunshine with a little empathy, sympathy and compassion. Sympathy is the act of acknowledging we are aware of another's distress. Empathy takes it a step further, allowing us to not only offer compassion for another person's pain, but to put ourselves in another person's shoes and walk around in that. Carl Safina takes us a step further. Safina shows us how to position ourselves to expand our empathy, to walk further into the depths of our ability to feel. Homework instructions (due 4/10/20 by 8P): 1) Watch the Safina video. 2) Apply what you've learned about empathy and compose a response in your partner's voice. 3) Think about the story of the incident that led you to participate in this group...