It's after Thanksgiving and before Christmas. Many of us are now on the other side of spending the first major holiday without the family we thought would be together forever. We survived the dread that led up to the moment, and we waded through the awkward minutes that made up the hours that made up the day and all its hundreds of thousands agonizing thoughts. Good for us. Some of us, however, did not fare so well. For a few of us, there were major setbacks: unhealthy disagreements, dysfunctional conflicts, the finality of a once-hoped-for relationship, and for others maybe even an arrest. Still, we live on. Regardless of how well or not so well we did, our next question should be: how do we improve? Dr. James Hollis has a message for men (that can be applied to women too, honestly). Take a look at this: Hollis said that "all men have moments of shame in their lives, and they tend not to forgive themselves for these things. ... The shaming value for most men sho